Friday, January 9, 2015


I was such a sloth yesterday. And boy was a I serious grump. Dane was heytelling me, and anyone who knows him knows he doesn't talk slow, but for some reason, yesterday he was. In my head he was anyway. I wanted to scream back into my phone, "FOR THE LOVE OF PETE, WHY ARE YOU SPEAKING SO SLOWLY?!" I don't know why it even mattered except my nerves were short and I just didn't have time for slow heytells, of course. I mean, I was sitting at work typing up my blog. Duh. Then, he said, "we should do yoga when you get home." Bless his little yoga loving heart. I know he's trying to be supportive, and what I said was, "okay, but you know we have to do a beginner video because I fucking hate yoga." My real reaction was a body message mixture of a sloth, and a 6 year old not getting his way. The sound I made was more like a whining wookie yell. But, I went home and we did yoga, and I did not die. Then I worked out with my friend Jen. I did my first WOD in...I don't even know how long. It really felt good. I needed that because I feel like today I have a fresh outlook and more motivation. Thanks, Jen! Thanks for the accountability!

A couple of other things that happened, my forehead is all kinds of broke out. It's like I'm a hormone charged, teenager. My body is like, "GET IT ALL OUT"! Then I woke up at about 5:00 a.m. today with a brutal headache. Well, goes with the territory. The good thing is that regardless of what I've said, I really haven't had any urge to stray off the Whole30. I do feel better already. I have also noticed that my mood is directly correlated to the pants I'm wearing. I'm wearing my fleece lined leggings today instead of jeans. It's like the difference between regular jeans and maternity jeans. I'm getting blood flow to my brain, so I'm happier. That's good for everyone in my life. Also, do you ever have one of those days where the right song just happens to always be playing? Like, you have a real life soundtrack going on? That totally happened to me all day today. That's always a good time. 

Side note: I totally bawl every time I watch The Biggest Loser. No shit. Like flowing non-stop tears. I'm always so inspired by these people, and I'm just SO happy for them! It's a show that just genuinely makes you feel good. 

Ok, here go the pictures I've been dreading putting up. But, lets face the facts, friends. Aren't we all full of flaws? None of us are shear perfection and if you think you are then you're just a dick. We are all just trying to get through life the best that we can, and if we can't laugh at ourselves along the way then we are ALL just dicks. 

Back in 2013 Dane went on his "vacation deployment", as we like to refer to it. He basically went on a humanitarian mission and was sailing the South Pacific all summer. He got to see some amazing places that the majority of us will never have the opportunity to see. He totally got to see some islands that were occupied during that's not cool as shit, then I don't what is. Anyway....

Right when he left I had just left my job to go back to school full time. I had all summer until I started classes so, needless to say, I had a lot of time on my hands. The bottom left hand picture is what I looked like when he left. I decided to straighten my shit up and get after it. So, one Whole30 and 2 months of dedication to working out later, the bottom right hand corner is where I ended up. I stayed there for awhile, but after he came home it was a little more difficult. He makes me drink more! I swear, he holds me down and pours the wine in my mouth. I don't want it. Fine, I do. Shut up. I have been on a slow and steady decline since. Top picture is now and those are the jeans that used to swallow me. By swallow, I mean I rarely wore them because they were so big I was pulling them up constantly. Now, they are known as...mushroom top jeans. I think it's pretty obvious that I'm a total yoyo'er. Always have been. 

Ok, that's it for today. I'm tired. I'm not feeling it anymore. So, here's a cute little owl. Enjoy.

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